A Plague of Goblins

"Let him not breed in great numbers, for he will make a desert of his home and yours."

- Planet of the Apes (1968)

Goblin plagues are suffered in the less settled areas of the world, particularly in the lands of Arn, though they have been known in the wilder parts of the Eridan continent, as well. They are more common in places which lie near ancient ruins. In such an infestation, tens, perhaps hundreds, of goblins swarm forth from underground dens or nests. They overrun manor, hamlet, and village, and have even been known to assail the gates of small cities.

No one knows what spawns goblins, but it is certain they don't reproduce in the manner of most humanoids. All goblins seem to be of the same sex, though in truth, this is something of a conjecture. Smaller goblins, perhaps immature ones, are seen among their swarms, but never is any parental nurturing or concern offered them by any of their fellows.

It's difficult to guess the intelligence of goblins. There's no questioning their cunning, but they don't structures or make tools, behaving only as brute beasts. This may be more preference than lack of capacity, as there are reports of them taking up knives and even smallswords and brandishing them in deadly mockery of men. Though they may wear rags or stolen bits of clothing or armor as rude decoration, they are just as happy to go naked.

When swarms of goblins pour forth from the underground, they tend to move toward human habitations, though wild animals will sometimes suffer their assaults. While popular entertainments have made much of the mischievous nature of goblin attacks--their crude pranks, surprise scares, and harassment of livestock--their deadliness is not be discounted. Typically, the actions of the swarm escalate from behaviors which create fear or annoyance to outright attacks with their sharp teeth, stolen weapons, fire, and large numbers. They have been known to consume humans they kill, but that seems to be an after-though.

The infestations may last as little as a night or two or as long as a month, depending on the amount of resistance they encounter. If the swarm doesn't end of its on accord, it can be dispersed by killing a quarter or more of its number.

Scholars have attempted to discern how goblin plagues may be predicted. Folklore suggests that they are "summoned"--perhaps by children entering puberty. Adolescents suffering from the anxiety of an unwanted betrothal, the birth of a new sibling, or other sorts of emotional duress are thought to become unwitting "Goblin Kings" or "Goblin Queens," and call forth their subjects in some psychic manner.  Naturalists remained unconvinced but are at a loss to explain the tales of goblins paying rude homage (in imitation of human courtly deference) to a single child in a decimated village or attempting to abduct such a child without harming them in any other way.

Release the Kraken!

I saw the Clash of the Titans remake this morning with some friends.  Contrary to the lackluster pronouncements of several critics, we three fans of the original film enjoyed it.

The plot follows a broadly similar outline to the '81 original, though a theme of Man versus God is emphasized (and perhaps over-emphasized.  We got it already!), and a true villain is added--instead of just antagonists--which is what I think the original had.

Comparing the 1981 and 2010 films is interesting.  The remake suffers from what I see as a common flaw of modern genre/action film screenwriting compared to the style of older films.  Events are streamlined, probably in the name of making the film more "fast-paced," leading to the feeling of jumping from one action set piece to another, and inevitably losing some filler details, and atmosphere-building.  Serving this same goal of narrative straight-forwardness, characters are eliminated and "good guy" and "bad guy" tend to get more sharply drawn.  And this is all in comparsion to an original which was a pretty shallow fantasy film!

This rapid pace tends to necessitate broadly painted characters, and character "bits" are almost inevitably scenes of comic relief and badass-itude.  These can be well-down and enjoyable, but also feel cliched.  Of course, secondary characters in the original (besides Burgess Meredith's character) can hardly be said to be developed at all, so I suppose you could view this as an improvement.

CGI is certainly superior to stop-motion in terms of versatility and versumilitude, but the "ritual dance" nature of a lot of modern action sequence direction, means that doesn't equate to greater thrill value most of the time.  The giant scorpion sequence in the new film is certainly more frenetic, but I can't neccessarily say that its better. 

The ferry across the Styx, likewise, isn't really any better or worse, though for different reasons.  The Stygian witches, I think, actually work better in the original, though I can't put my finger on exactly why--and admittedly, I'm working form memory.

So did the new one do anything better?  Sure.  The Olympians with speaking roles seem more "into it" than the slumming stars of the original.  The "floor map" of the world in Olympus is a lot cooler than the "amphitheater"the god's crowd around in the original.  Princess Andromeda is better developed, if in cliched ways.  The sets for Argos are sumptuous. 

The thing the new film does best in my opinion is the medusa.  She's fast moving, and so more menacing, but she also has a great deal of expression in her facial animation.  You actually get a sense of the medusa as a charatcer, more than just an obstacle.

Anyway, its worth checking out, in my opinion--though the 3D doesn't add anything, so save yourself a few bucks.

Return of the Comic Book Swordswomen!

This continues my examination of sword-wielding female leads in fantasy comics. The first installment can be found here.

As the seventies waned, so did comic book fantasy, and some of the swordswomen were victims of that dolorous stroke. Starfire didn't make it. Ghita would only later be found in collections. Red Sonja continued in a stuttering fashion in the eighties with three ongoings (one only lasting two issues) and a movie tie-in.

The old guard retired to comics' Valhalla, and others arose to take up the charge. The new swordswomen were somewhat less cheesecake-centric than their seventies fore-bearers, and often existed more detailed, better realized worlds.

The first of these, as mentioned last time, had a link to Red Sonja. In Epic Illustrated #10 (February 1982), Marada She-Wolf, written by Chris Claremont and illustrated by John Bolton, debuted. Marada fought fantastic menaces in the early Imperial Roman era with the aid of her companion, the sorceress Arianrhod. As initially written, Claremont's and Bolton's story had featured Red Sonja, but copyright complications triggered by the impending movie made that impossible. The story was retooled and Marada was born.

Marada She-Wolf fought evil sorcerers across the Roman world through a total of five issues of Epic Illustrated. The initial three-part arc was collected, colored and slightly modified for Marvel Graphic Novel #21: Marada She-Wolf (1985). A third story for Epic Illustrated was reportedly planned, but never saw print.

In 1984, Marvel's Epic imprint upped the ante with a whole island of swordswomen. Sisterhood of Steel was the creation of Christy Marx, and was drawn by Mike Vosburg. The series tells the story of Boronwe, a young woman coming of age as a member of a society of amazonian mercenaries. Sisterhood of Steel looked different from its predecessors--no chainmail bikinis here (though there is an awful lot of eighties' big hair). It also had more of a literary fantasy approach. The society of the amazons and how it interacts with the larger world are important part of the story. Then there was your standard epic fantasy who's who and pronunciation guide published in first issue, and essays about the Sisterhood's culture in later issues.

There was to be more of the Sisterhood of Steel after the initial limited series, but disagreements between Marx and her editors over content put an end to that. A graphic novel was published in 1987, in association with Eclipse, with art by Marx's husband, Peter Ledger.

There's a lull at the end of the eighties in our parade of sword-wielding heroines. Red Sonja appears again from Cross Plains in 1999, and then returns in an ongoing (and still going) series from Dynamite in 2003. But these are throwbacks--returns to seventies form with a modern veneer. In 1999, though, we got a swordswoman who would pick up where Sisterhood of Steel left off with more literary fantasy style storytelling and complexity--and the greater amount of clothing (mostly).

Mark Smylie's Artesia is an ambitious (and currently incomplete) epic fantasy series of six-issue limited serieses and annuals. It tells the story of the titular Artesia, a former concubine turned war captain, who is betrayed by her former lover. This starts a chain of events that makes Artesia the leader of large armies, and a player in epic conflicts on the world stage. Artesia is sort of like Queen Medb clad in Joan of Arc's plate armor. Her world, the Known World, is like the ancient world in fifteenth century drag, and recalls Glorantha in the way myth and religion are given prominent roles. It's no surprise, given the amount of detail Smylie has put into the world, that its made the transition to role-playing game setting.

Artesia, as a strong female lead, has seemed to appeal to a lot of female comic book readers (or at least, female comic book critics). No doubt fantasy fans have also taken to Artesia for its epic storyline and richly detailed world.

And then, of course, there's a lot of sex. No Red Sonja-esque prudery for Artesia.

Unfortunately, Smylie is still in the middle of Artesia. Responsibilities as publisher seem to be taking up his time. The fourth limited, Artesia Besieged, has been stalled since 2009 on the third issue.

Thus ends the tale of the swordswomen of comics--at least for now. Hopefully, the future will bring us a conclusion to Artesia's saga, and then another generation, so Red Sonja in her chainmail bikini doesn't have to fight the good fight alone.