Azurthite Bestiary: Cosmic Cat

Art by Joel Priddy

It is fearfully discussed by nervous rats in conclaves beneath the cities of Man, casually rumored by upended bats hanging from branches in moonlight, and philosophically considered by telepathic xvats scuttling slowly through frigid, Plutonian twilight, that there are ultraerrene creatures not unlike cats, that visit Earth from some higher sphere. These Cosmic Cats may leap from a passing comet or arrive curled and napping upon a falling star.

To call a Cosmic Cat a cat is to rely on the most superficial of resemblances. It has the general shape of a common cat (if one ignores the fleshy antennae) to be sure, but it is about size of a lynx, and its tail tapers to a point in an almost reptilian fashion. It has no fur, and its silken hide is awash with changing patterns of color like some varieties of cuttlefish.

What Cosmic Cats do on Earth is their own affair, and rarely does it seem to others that they have any goal whatsoever--but here one would do well not to jump to conclusions. The cats demonstrate (or at least they claim to possess) a cosmic awareness that renders all time and distance transparent. Certainly, they seem to have great insight--any Cosmic Cat you meet will tell you as much--but when they share that insight with others, they inevitably do so highly cryptic manner.

COSMIC CAT
small aberration, chaotic neutral (good)
AC 13 (natural armor)
Hit Points: 85
Speed: 40 ft.
STR 14(+2) DEX 15(+2) CON 16(+3) INT 19(+4) WIS 16(+3) CHA 16(+3)
Skills  Insight +8
Damage Immunities bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing from nonmagical weapons
Senses Truesight 60 ft., passive Perception 13
Languages telepathy 120 ft.

Limited Magic Immunity. A cosmic cat is immune to spells of 6th level or lower unless it wishes to be affected. It has advantage on saving throws against all other spells and magical effects.
Innate Spellcasting (Psionics). The cosmic cat's spellcasting ability is intelligence (spell save DC 15). It can innately cast the following spells with no components:

At will: blink, detect magic, detect thoughts
3/day: confusion, hypnotic pattern, levitate, identify
1/ day: plane shift (self only)

Actions:
Bite. Melee weapon attack: +4 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: 4 (1d4+2) piercing damage.

Geographic Highlights of Yanth

Computer issues stymied me in getting a new Land of Azurth monster post ready for you guys today, so instead let's revisit Gus's map of the Country of Yanth above and I'll elucidate a few locales:

Aldwode. A dense and ancient forest inhabited by wild Wood Elf tribes and dotted with the fey, hidden demesnes of the High Elf folk.

Apiaria. The Hive City of the Bee Folk and the center of the domain of their Queen, who is always named Melitta. Relations between the Bee Folk and the humans of Yanth have been pleasant but rather formal for some time. Wealthy Yanthians benefit from trade in the Bee Folk royal jelly from which an anti-aging tonic is made.

Enchanted Wood. A virgin forest  renowned for its plant and animal life, all of which are capable of speech. (Though admittedly, most remain silent as they have little to say.) This eldritch peculiarity owes to the waters of the Babbling Brook that runs through the forest and enhances the linguistic capabilities of all who drink from it. For adult animals, this effect is temporary, but creatures raised on it retain these characteristics perhaps indefinitely. The brook itself (as the name suggests) is vocal, and even at its susurrating volume, it can at times impair the concentration of spellcasters and unnerve those around it for long periods. The Spouting Spring that is its source is even worse. Its ceaseless chorus of nonsensical orations are taken as oracular glossolalia by some and tormenting, demonic cacophony by others.

Horologopolis. A subkingdom where many aspects of the lives of its citizenry are predetermined at birth by extensive application of the astrological and numerologic sciences. Horoscopes are prepared and zealously amended and consulted throughout a citizen’s lifetime by the great tabulating engines controlled by the Master Time Keeper, a giant, many-armed construct with a head like a clock face. Those who stray from their appointed role or seek to alter their fate in significant ways are corrected by his agents, the more humanoid, but likewise clockfaced, Watchmen.

Mount Geegaw. A mountain near or in the Dragon Spines. It is also known as the Prismatic Peak, as the upper perhaps two thirds of the mountain are an oblique triangular prism made of transparent crystal. The origins of Mount Geegaw are lost, but few serious scholars believe it to be an entirely natural formation. 

Wednesday Comics: Things You Might Have Missed

Two great sci-fi comic collections have come out this year that might have come in under the radar. That would be a shame, as they're both from accomplished writer/artists and both well worth checking out:

Star Slammers: The Complete Collection is a work by Walt Simonson, conceived and began before his time at Marvel and DC, but first officially published by Marvel, then later continued under Malibu's Bravura imprint and Dark Horse. This tale of interplanetary mercenaries has the feel of something that might have come out of 2000AD or maybe Heavy Metal but with a style that is all Simonson, even as it was developing.

The 6 Voyages of Lone Sloane was originally presented in Heavy Metal (or Metal Hurlant) and begins the weird and baroque science fantasy saga of Lone Sloane a man given strange powers after encountering a Lovecraftian cosmic entity and throwm into another dimension. He becomes a freebooter and Han Solo-esque rogue involved in various space opera struggles. Philippe Druillet (like Simonson) has his own distinct style. If there was something called Cosmic Acid Space Opera, this would be it.

A Weird Adventures Review

It's been a long time since we had one of these, but Corey Ryan Walden has done a review of Weird Adventures on his blog. Check out his other reviews, as well!

Tussle with the Tornado Tyrant!

Art by Richard Svensson

When we last left off in our 5e Land of Azurth game, the party had just triumphed over a group of hairy humanoids in the dungeon of a castle in the clouds. They are still stuck on a cloud island with no means off, and the magic stone they worked so hard to get in still in the hands of a evil giant wizard. Party roll call: Cully (the bard), Dagmar (the cleric), Erkose (the fighter), Kairon (the sorcerer), and Shae (the ranger).

One of the goons managed to summon the jailer: a two-headed, musclehead troll with the bombastic demeanor of a pro-wrestler. Unaware of the troll's regeneration  power, the group lucks up when and Kairon uses a flame attack. The bardic dissonant whispers sends the troll off to get a workout in.

King Cumulo (freed by the party last session) is marshaling his troops for an assault on the castle, hoping to drive Zykloon and his henchmen from it. He gives the party some healing pills and his people show them how to command the giant flying ship. Cumulo offers the party a roll in the glorious battle to come. They enquire about treasure; he tells them the biggest hall is guarded by a multiheaded Skydra in the lowest level of the dungeon, but that Zykloon is probably keeping the stone he stole from the party in his tower:

Though Cumulo also mentions Queen Desira of Virid's glass pegasus, Zephyr, is in the giant's terrarium--and she'll likely pay a reward--the party focuses on the Whim-Wham stone. When the Cloud Folk head off for the attack, the party heads over to the top of the tower in the flying ship.

They decide stealth is prudent. Kairon turns Shae and the flogling thief they rescued, Woggins, invisible and they sneak into the tower from the observation deck. Seeing a number of strange things, they soon find Zykloon's bed chamber--where he's still sleeping!

Something awakens the giant, but he doesn't see his tower's invisible infiltrators. After talking with his minions with some technological device, he leaves to join the battle. The party searches his quarters and finds and invisible object under his bed that radiates magic and a large chest in his closet that has magic objects inside it.

The party moves their loot to the ship and takes off for home, figuring they can deal with investigating the haul when they're out of harm's way.

Own Over the Garden Wall

The great  Cartoon Network mini-series by Patrick McHale (previoualy of Adventure Time!) is now available on DVD (no blu-ray, unfortunately). I wrote about it when it aired, but I'll give a pull-quote from that post here:

"It's part Grimms' fairy tales, part Wizard of Oz (and maybe a bit Sandberg's Rootabaga Stories), imbued with great deal of folksiness. Where Adventure Time has rap and chiptunes, OtGW has parlor music and ragtime. Where Adventure Time has non sequiturs and weirdness, Over the Garden Wall has whimsy (not that it isn't weird at times)."

Check it out.

The Stone Sages

by David Lewis Johnson

In the Country of Yanth in the Land of Azurth there is a circle of eight monolithic stone heads in which reside the intellects of great sages of  pasts eras. No one knows who constructed the stones or how the particular sages were chosen. These are questions the members of the circle are unable or unwilling to answer. The names of the sages and their scholarly specialties are:

Whindbog the Historian
Blathrur the Astronomer
Pomphus the Philologist
Laangvynd the Geographer
Eggedd the Scientist
Baombast the Physician
Drohninon the Mathematician
Nowhitaul the Theologian

These learned minds may be consulted by touching their respective stone, allowing telepathic communication as long as the contact is maintained. They will answer questions put to them, though they tend to do so with a degree of irritation and condescension.