Wednesday Comics: DC, March 1981 (wk 1 pt 2)

My goal: read DC Comics' output from January 1980 (cover date) to Crisis! This week, I'm looking at the comics at newsstands around December 11, 1980.

Justice League of America #188: Perhaps editorial--or maybe even Conway, himself--realized the Super-Friends level story of duplicated powers and JLA members turned into working stiffs was weak sauce for a two-parter. So it winds up a one-and-a-half parter with the cover this issue being taken by a Conway/Buckler joint about about malfunctioning killer-satellite that attacks the JLA's satellite, trapping the Leaguers not in the other story there. It's an interesting "race against time" problem-solving tale, superior to the other story. It weirdly tries to be a Hanukkah story too, with the Atom learning the meaning of the holiday and ends with him telling the other League members about it.

The first story sees the JLA coming to join Flash (who has evaded transformation into a normie himself) to defeat the counterfeit, jewel-thief League. Zatana, transformed into an old woman, doesn't make it back on her own, but the Flash goes to rescue her. Those two seen to decide to nip their romance in the bud and just be friends.

New Teen Titans #5: So much keeps happening in these issues, but not a lot of importance yet. The Titans abandoned Raven last issue after learning how she manipulated them--particularly Kid Flash, but when she's captured by Trigon, they come to her rescue. They defeat a minion of of Trigon's with teamwork, but then the main man show's up and they all go to Azarath. There the Titans are unable to defeat him and the pacifists of Azarath won't help, so Raven agrees to join Trigon to save everyone.

Secrets of Haunted House #34: In the first story, Destiny just kind of toys with an unpleasant blonde model who wants desperately to one up her brunette rival. Destiny seems to be granting her wishes, but whatever the she gets her rival receives double. She keeps trying to think of something good that either can't be doubled or will be bad when doubled, but she keeps being frustrated. On the last go-round, she asks for a handsome lover six feet tall, but then her rival gets two identical lovers meeting that description--except all three guys turn out to be vampires. Ms. Charlie Seegar and E Cruz were responsible for this nonsense. The next story by Wessler and Ken Barr isn't much better. It involves occupying Nazi forces suffering all sorts of calamities, and the source turns out to be--a group of Maquis dwarfs hiding underground, and I don't mean dwarfs of the fairytale kind.

The Mister E story by Rozakis and Speigle doesn't really redeem this issue, but it does have a kind of amusing ending, where Mister E uses acid to dissolve the stitching between parts in a Frankenstein's monster, causing it to fall apart.

Secrets of the Legion of Super-Heroes #3: After last issue's reveal that a Legionnaire may be Brande's kid (though it's not revealed how that know this), Brande's assistant and the doctors explain that Brande has a rare blood type, but he needs a transfusion to survive Yorssian Fever. They review the histories of the remaining Legionnaires, even the dead ones and the Subs! Then they get to the reservists like Jimmy Olsen and Lana Lang. It seems like just taking blood samples would be better than reviewing origin stories, but what do I know about the holistic nature of 30th Century medicine, right? Saturn Girl manages to telepathic pick up from Brande's unconscious brain that he once had powers. They realize they have made a mistake excluding nonhuman species and humanoid races that inherit powers.  In the end they figure it out: Chameleon Boy, of course. Brande is saved.

Superman #357: This story opens with both Superman and Vartox effectively prisoners on Tynola. Superman literally so, as he's gone "undercover" as a interplanetary criminal and has been imprison in a smallish sphere, which really is cruel and unusual punishment. Still, he's able to use his super-senses to suss out that the Tynolans derive their reality manipulating "chant" powers from Noxumbra, a space-traveling, god-monster. They plan to feed Vartox to Noxumbra in exchange for his continued blessing. They mostly seem to use their power to magic up things for Vartox to fight, so it all seems a bit circular to me, but anyway! Superman breaks out and gives Noxumbra indigestion by substituting himself for the hyper-power Noxumbra usual feeds on. With the god-monster, gone Vartox still agrees to stay and help the Tynolans and Superman goes home. There is some cleverness here in how Vartox and Superman use their super-powers to avoid their plotting being detected by the advanced Tynolans, but overall it's a better idea than execution.

The backup story is another "Superman of 2021" yarn. He fights a forgettable villain and gets a date with his boss.

Superman Family #206: Superman Family was just not what I needed this week. It feels like a step-down from last time--and that was not a comic I was dying to read. The okay stuff include the Harris/Mortimer Supergirl tale which i think has more scenes of Supergirl in lingerie than I've ever seen in a comic. It really has a romance comic feel at the beginning, which is not wholly out of place because it's about a lookalike (Lesla-Lar) trying to steal Kara's life--literally. The non-romance angle is that it revolves around her parents, not a beau. The "Mr. and Mrs. Superman" story guest stars Harlequin (the Earth-2 character) and briefly Green Lantern (Earth-2), but it's better than the rock-bottom silliness of "The Private Life of Clark Kent" bit by Rozakis and Calnan. 

The Lois Lane story is sort of a coda to the multi-part arc that ended last issue. Lois gets her memories back finally in the Fortress of Solitude, then goes off to say good-bye to the guy she fell for while amnestic. Superman is cool with all that, but I guess he would be, because he's Superman. The final story has Jimmy Olsen chased by yokels on the payroll of chemical polluters in the Poconos.

Weird War Tales #97: The Creature Commandos are back! This time, the story is a bit better, and the characters are less universal monster knockoffs. DeMatteis (credited as creator here as well as writer), focuses the dramatic core of this story on Lt. Shrieve and what appears to be a burgeoning attraction between him and a scientist, Dr. Frederique, the Commandos have rescued from the Germans. The Doctor argues against Shrieve's reduction of the Germans to simply faceless "Nazi Pigs" to be killed. Unfortunately, she isn't the scientist but a German spy. Though she leads the Commandos into an ambush, she warns them at the last minute, getting shot in the process. The Commandos prevail, but the fake Frederique dies after confessing her duplicity and her remorse to Shrieve. The Commandos ask about burying her, but Shrieve replies there's no need as she's just another Nazi Pig, but his face as he turns away from his men betrays his true feelings.

The second story by Rozakis and Spiegle is a mini-epic with a U.S. agent discovering a Nazi experiment in mind control via something like astral projection. They have already taken over Stalin. The agent infiltrates the Kremlin and frees Stalin with some judiciously applied electricity from a broken lamp. Back in London, he discovers that the Nazi scientist Kreuger has now gotten to Churchill. The agent steals an RAF plane and drops strips of tinfoil (used to block radar) over Parliament when Churchill is there, blocking the signal and freeing the Prime Minister. In the U.S., they recreate the German device with the agent as the guinea pig. It kills him--but his mental projection is freed to protect FDR from Nazi control. The thoughtforms of Kreuger and the agent do battle in the sky, until a lightning bolt destroys the Nazi. The agent goes into the scientist's body long enough to sabotage the German device.

Wonder Woman #277: If you've ever wanted to see a group of Kobra agents shake themselves until they explode in a pile of goo when compelled to tell the truth by Wonder Woman's magic lasso, well Conway and Delbo made this issue for you! Wonder Woman is on the trail of Kobra who has the Cobalt 93 bomb and is holding the world's oil fields for ransom. She consults an old voodoo practitioner for some reason and gets to hear the Kobra cults origin and that of King Kobra (though minus Jason Burr). She heads off to Delhi and winds up falling into Kobra's hands.

The Levitz and Staton Huntress backup has Helena worrying over the fact that her DA sort of boyfriend has figured out her secret identity. Lucky for her she lives next to a woman being blackmailed by her estranged husband, which allows her to distract herself with a little easy crimefighting.